(Continued from p.8)
fantastic travel opportunity?The ward directorate says that we can take chances with the Golan, since Assad can be trusted, and Syria honors its signed agreements. And yet, the Golan deal would itself be a violation of one of Assad's commitments. It would solidify Syria's occupation of Lebanon, thus violating the Ta'if agreement, in which the Assad regime committed itself to leave Lebanon. Is the belief of the ward that although Syria violates agreements it made with the U.S. and the Arabs, it will honor treaties with the Jewish state?
A conversation overheard in the mental ward: "What good is Assad's signature - isn't he sick and about to die? What will become of our peace deal?" Their concerns were soon alleviated: "Don't worry," came the answer. "Whose signature could be worse and less reliable? Assad has violated every water agreement he ever signed with the Jordanians and the Turks, and his cease-fire with us; slaughtered tens of thousands of his own people; awarded a medal of honor to the soldier responsible for the axe-murders of Israeli captives; provided refuge for Adolph Eichmann's right-hand man, Alois Brunner; and murdered a major Druze leader as well as Lebanese President Amin Jemayal. And this is only a partial list." The listeners were comforted.
Experts hired by the psychiatric ward are looking for solutions for the expected lack of water after Israel recognizes "Syrian rights" to Golan water. One serious possibility being considered: Offer the Syrians water from Turkey!
It is told that in Chelm, somebody removed the protective railing from the local bridge. Carriages fell off and many people unfortunately died. But the Chelmites found a way to rectify the situation: "Let's build a hospital under the bridge!" In the mental ward, too, they are preparing similar solutions for the Jewish population that is to be evacuated, the IDF which is to retreat, the new arms race, the Palestinian refugees in Lebanon and Syria, the water shortage, and the environmental and security problems. How comforting!
Elyakim Haetzni, Esq., a former Knesset Member of the Tehiya party, resides in Kiryat Arba. He authors a column in Yediot Ahronot, and speaks weekly on the Arutz-7 radio station on which he gave this mental ward update.
Americans For a Safe Israel
1623 Third Ave. (at 92nd St.) - Suite 205
New York, NY 10128
Outpost - 12 - January 2000